When my alarm went off at 5am this morning, I thought "oops, forgot to shut my alarm off last night...it's Saturday". Then I rolled over and went back to sleep. Which would have been fine if it weren't Friday, which I remembered after I heard Jillian wake up and hour and a half later. So I missed my vanpool and drove myself into work later. Not exactly how I wanted to start my Friday, but at least there is a three day weekend to look forward to.
It has been a very busy week, which explains my lack of posts. Wednesday, in particular, was a bit hectic as I had a day of meetings and presentations bookended by doctor's appointments in the early morning and late afternoon. The morning appointment was at the maternal fetal medicine clinic to get a follow-up ultrasound of the brain part with the borderline measurement (the cisterna magna for those who are curious). The ultrasound tech said it hadn't really grown in the past few weeks, but the doctor said the measurement was still borderline. He did not seem too concerned though, because there are no other markers of a problem and none of his research of medical textbooks turned up any problem that would be evident by that measurement alone. This finding matches my even more reliable research via Dr. Google. Still they want to see me back next month for yet another ultrasound to measure again. They've got to earn a living somehow I suppose.
My late afternoon appointment was with my regular OB, Dr. C. She also seemed unconcerned about the cisterna magna, and told me that as ultrasound technology gets better and better they are able to measure more and more anatomical parts without really understanding what is and is not truly normal thus worrying prospective parents like myself. She agreed that my decision not to do the amnio made perfect sense. I told her about all the back pain I have been having with this pregnancy. For a few months now my lower right back hurts horribly after I do anything remotely active. I got some back pain with my last pregnancy but nothing significant until late in 3rd tri. I am pretty sure that a little 15 month old somebody might have a small part to play with this, and while I can limit holding her it is tough to resist her upheld arms and pathetic looks for long. So Dr. C prescribed PT and massage therapy, which I start next week. I welcome the back pain relief, but I'm not too thrilled about trying to fit even more pregnancy related appointments into my rather tight schedule.
But before getting too sorry for myself and my aches and pains, I think of Sunny hanging out on bedrest. Endless days in bed with daytime television is a much worse punishment than having to fit a weekly massage into the schedule.
Jillian continues to be her usual energetic self and is increasingly adding some "fun" toddler elements to our daily routine. Like temper tantrums. My God, can that kid throw a fit complete with throwing things when she is angry. Bedtime has become rather difficult because she knows what is coming after her bath and she resists mightly. Putting pajamas on a raging toddler with an arched back is not exactly the highlight of my day. She cries all the way to her crib, and when I set her down and hand her the pacifier she prompty throws it down. Once I close the door she is usually asleep within 10 minutes. But the tears leading up to that peaceful slumber are just heart wrenching. I do my best to ignore and smile knowing that the consistent routine is important. But oh how I miss the days of setting a quiet, happy baby in the crib and watching her turn over on her belly instantly and snuggle in for the night. I don't know whether the issue is separation anxiety, or the molars growing in, or what. I wish I could diagnose the problem and fix it, but I've long learned that babies and now apparently toddlers just don't work that way.
Jillian has spirit if nothing else. I keep trying to convince myself that this is a good thing.