I have never been one to handle sleep deprivation well. I become cranky. I drink a lot of caffeine. Probably unsafe levels. I eat a lot of cookies. And I make very little sense. So good luck following this post.
You see I have always placed high value on my sleep. In college, when other students who crammed all night before an exam, I'd go to bed early even if I hadn't finished my preparations. As an adult I have never been a night owl and usually had to drag Jeramy away from parties so I could get some sleep. As a parent, I have always made it a priority to get my kids on a bedtime routine so that I could go to bed at a reasonable hour. (Well and I guess to help instill good sleeping habits in my children...it's not always about me).
So when illness strikes like this past week and I only get a few hours of sleep each night for a week...well...I feel like I morph into some kind of psychopathic bitch. My sole life's purpose becomes finding a way to someway, somehow increase hours of sleep. Preferably consecutive hours.
Sometimes I really feel like I'm alone in this. That if I were a perfect mom, sleep would be unnecessary. I despise reading Facebook posts of new moms that go like this:
"It's so amazing how little sleep I can function on and still be a super, fantabulous mommy. Who needs sleep when I have this darling munchkin in my life!"
In my assessment, these moms are either:
A: Infinitely superior to me
B: Superheroes with the ability to function with no sleep
C: Lying to themselves in hopes that if they say it, it's true
D: Trying to live up to the unattainable perfect mom persona
For the record...I really hate D.
I mean can't we just be honest sometimes? Losing sleep sucks. Changing diaper blow outs sucks. Taking care of sick children sucks. Diffusing a new temper tantrum every 30 minutes sucks. Having your hair pulled by a 10 month old with the strength of Superman sucks.
So when I'm tired and hear other moms drone on and on about their amazing lives, I get cranky. I guess that there are just times that I look around and feel like all I see are perfect moms on FB...perfect moms on blogs...perfect moms on message boards. You know the ones. Skinny. Glowing complexions. Fashionable. With beautifully dressed well-behaved children. Their lives captured in pristine photographs. No worries about money. Whip up gourmet meals every night. Have perfect relationships with their gorgeous and appreciative husbands. Amazingly talented. And always well rested on just one hour of sleep.
It's times like these that I remember that I'm am just not one of those moms. I can't do it all. And right now all I can really manage to do is work on getting these sick kids better and squeeze in a couple hours of sleep. Perfection, it seems, will have to wait.